Dad is Bad?!

 Dad is Bad ?!

“The greatest gift I have ever had came from God, and I call him Dad”  -Anonymous

              

                                                 

These are troubled times! Turbulent too!!

Hardly a week ago, it was reported that "a furious Texas father pulled a man who was molesting his four-year old daughter off the child and beat him to death!"

More recently:  "Seven-year old raped, murdered" (“The Hindu”, June 18)

And now:

Another father, still worse, allegedly raped his own four-year old daughter in Bangalore.

The report (detailed write up already published in all leading Indian dailes) :

Suja Jones, a travel agent in Kolkatta meets Pascal Mazurier, a French Consulate employee.  The two marry in France (2001).  They have three children. The first one is son (2005), second,  a baby girl and the unfortunate victim of this story(2008), and the third a boy baby (2010). 

While pregnant with her third child, Suja says she learnt from her daughter that Pascal  (more appropriate if you misspelt  his name)  was hurting her on her private parts. The girl starts complaining of pain and her father is sexually abusing her.  The upset mother referred her daughter to a doctor, and the latter’s report confirmed the abuse.

Suja immediately lodged a complaint against her husband, accusing him of raping her daughter. Pascal has been arrested since.  The wife, obviously, wants no mercy to be shown.

Well, now, to comprehend the two issues:

·         The trauma of the little girl

·         What punishment to be meted out to the father

The worst agony: If a third person (next to father and mother) inflicts the abuse, the child can cry and complain to the dearest father and/or mother.  Especially the father, the man every girl is supposed to be able to trust.  Alas, if the father himself is the perpetrator, nay predator …… who can console the little one? 

“I love my papa; he hurts me”, cries the traumatized child, who is clearly confused.  Physically and emotionally hurt, she is too small to understand the impacts and intricacies. In case of murder, there is only a one-time death.  Whereas, here, the child will die everyday!  Once the girl deeply realizes the crime done by her father, she will begin to cry and continue to cry till she is tired of crying. Everyday!  Nightmarish!  After all, it is not easy to be only four years old and have this happened to you!  The long term emotional and psychological damage of sexual abuse and the repressed memories thereof can be devastating to the child.

If the child is of the age of 4 or 5 years (as in this case) and tries to break away from the abuser (father, in this case) , the latter may threaten the child with violence or loss of love.  If the abuse occurs within the family, the child may fear the anger or shame of other family members, or get afraid that the family will break up if the secret is told.

What a tragic shame!     He looted the innocence!!      He robbed her of being a child!!  How is a child to act when she is violated?  For most part they don’t understand what has happened to them or why.  Perverts of this nature don’t or can’t interact with normal adults so they prey on children.

A cross section of the people, on condition of anonymity,  ventilated their feelings:

“Any crime starts with “child” has to be worth minimum of 10 years R.I.  He is a monster, pure and simple” said a soft-ware engineer.

“May I remind that we live in India and people are INNOCENT until proven guilty”, sarcastically quipped an office-goer in his mid-forties.

“He deserved to be beaten to death.  Why a public hanging should not be recommended?”  exploded an angry young man.

“All pedophiles need to be killed”.

“Cut him up in little pieces and feed them to the vultures”.  “This is a very sick act to commit by any human standard”.

“If a four-year old girl is not spared, why should you spare the “Pascal’?
"Why this kola veri?"

The anger was all round,  loud and clear.  A disgrace to see so many perverts these days, we do not know how many cases go unreported because the kids are afraid to tell any one what had happened and the medico- legal procedure to validate is cumbersome.

Parents can be preventive by telling the children that if someone tries to touch your body and do things that will make you funny, say NO to that person and tell mom straight away.  As parents, our job is primarily to protect our children.  When parents are absent or not productively involved in their children’s life, that puts the kids at risk of the predators and other such sick people who prey on innocent little girls.

Take care!  Accidents always arrive unannounced!!

Dear parents,  you better tune into your instincts and listen to your children.  Your children are the best thing in your life, the most valuable. Protect them at any costs!

We are living with crimes. Crimes against children are not new. We have already accepted dilution of core values.  But this story of the father-turned-predator pricked in me a beyond-disappointment.

The verdict:

1. The father in question, nay, the questionable father must be penalized with death sentence, if not castration, without delay; (no wonder crime rates are low in Gulf nations!)

2. Paid expert-counselling and comprehensive medical attention should be afforded to the girl, and the mother (if need be).

Let's pray the small girl speedily recovers from such abhorrent experience.   And hope she will  be able to move forward in her life.

Wishing her nothing but the Best!

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Also read: http://kmurthy608.blogspot.in/2014/07/campus-rape-who-are-these-predators.html